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Sleepy Saturday Morning

April 18th, 2009

Fifteen Again

Do you ever have those nights where you dream one fascinating story after another? I dreamed of people I haven’t seen in years, dreamed of old friends, dreamed of interesting places. So much so that when I woke, I tried to get my head back in that same place, I wanted to keep on dreaming for a little while longer.

I had big plans for today. Big plans that were somehow a lot more exciting in the imaginary sunshine rather than the warm – but dreary – weather that seems to be the reality around Parkdale this morning.

Despite staying up far too late doing nothing last night, I was awake by 8am. I heard my roommate moving around, so decided to stay in bed until she was done with the bathroom and kitchen and stuff. At 9:30, I woke up again, and heard her leave with one of her friends. Up, finally, and showered, and the quiet time in the house guilted me into posting two more old patterns for sale on Ravelry.

Now, it’s just after noon. I’ve eaten two bowls of multigrain cheerios so I won’t be tempted into a yummy brunch. And I want to go out and go walking for awhile. And I also kind of just want to go back to bed.

Last weekend was spent Chez Swenson in St. Charles, Illinois. It’s kind of remarkable that my parents still live in the same house I grew up in, but weird too. My room hasn’t been my room for about ten years now. Lately, I’ve been sleeping in the guest room with the big bed rather than on my little old twin-sized daybed.

But going home will always be that… going home. The first few days are a lot of fun, and then it’s so easy to slip back into those teenage habits of being treated like a kid, and being resentful of that. I’m sure it’s hard on mom too… after all, I turned out to have far different of a life she’d always imagined for me. There is some lingering disappointment there, that will probably never entirely evaporate.

And my dad is getting so much older these past few months. I know you’d probably like to remind me that he’ll be 89 this fall, that it’s a wonderfully long life. But, I’m so not ready, and I somehow doubt I’d ever be.

So. I’ve done my chores for the morning. Now, do I go out walking? Do I brave a sudden rainstorm with no umbrella? Do I bring my camera, or my laptop or just a book?

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2 Responses to “Sleepy Saturday Morning”

  1. Patti Says:

    My dad just turned 87 a week ago and he still plays golf regularly and works a couple of days a week at a driving range. He attends the PGA show as a buyer annually (driving from Atlanta to Orlando). My grandparents on dad’s side of the family lived well into their 90’s so I’m with you – I just can’t really envision him getting “old” or slowing down.

    Enjoy every minute you have with him. You’re really blessed to have someone who has lived through so much. I know I am. 🙂

  2. Jen Bennett Says:

    I know what you mean about always slipping back into those teenage habits and the parent-thing! I’m 44 and my mom STILL treats me like , well, you get it. I also get the disappointment-thing. I think we just try and make the best possible decisions, at the time, that we can. I know-in the end, they still love us!! 🙂

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